Anxiety

I haven't had panic attacks in years, since right after the separation, but for the past two days, I've had that butterfly/nausea feeling, my heart has been racing, and I haven't been able to catch my breath. That is, unless I was doing yoga, or flying, or riding my bike...

Since I'm fine when I'm in my zen state, this is obviously psychosomatic. The question then is it's root. I'm feeling anxious on two different fronts, and don't know which this ongoing low-grade panic attack is attributable to. Also don't know how to get rid of it.

One front is situational, and involves a situation that I can't see improving for the next several years, unless by some miracle.

"The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity. The fears are paper tigers. You can do anything you decide to do. You can act to change and control your life; and the procedure , the process is its own reward."
-Amelia Earhart

[she's right. I've taken small steps to extricate myself from this situation from years. But nothing really substantial. That fear is holding me back, and I hate that. I don't like being a person that lets fear control herself. I guess that's why I got this latest panic attack. My psyche is telling me that something is very wrong, and that I had better stop ignoring it.]

The other, well, it's probably more in my head. I can distance myself from it, and that is probably what I really need to do, but I've got a bit of the moth to flame syndrome going on. I know that I'm going to be burned if I stay where I am. Still can't resist, however.